oofieSmack your Mac.
It goes oof.
Hit or knock your Mac and it talks back, out loud. The more you hit it, the angrier it gets.
💻 Mac only · macOS 13 or later
↑ go on, wake it up 🔊
It talks when you hit your Mac
Hit or knock your Mac and it says something out loud, in any voice on your Mac.
You set how hard you have to hit it
One slider. A light tap can be enough, or make it wait for a proper whack.
Change anything it says
Edit any line, delete it, or write your own. Put the originals back in two clicks.
The more you hit it, the angrier it gets
It starts with “Ow.” By the end it is counting down from ten.
Hide it on someone else’s Mac
Switch on Hide from the Dock and minimising makes oofie disappear completely while it keeps listening. They will not see an app — they will just hear their laptop talking.
It can scream, too
oofie says your lines out loud. You can also drop any of these sounds into a line, at any point you like — mid-sentence, before it, after it.
Scroll the list and you will hear each one as it passes.
See it in action
Demo video coming soon. Follow @isaacbuilds__ to catch it.
100 pre-orders by 1 September 2026, or everyone gets refunded in full, automatically.
Pre-order now →Requires a Mac (macOS 13+) — not Windows or iPhone. Refunds are automatic if the 100 isn't reached.
Questions
Is it recording me?
No. oofie listens for a loud, sudden knock and nothing else. No audio is saved, and nothing ever leaves your Mac. There is no account and no server.
Does it work on Windows or an iPad?
No. Mac only, macOS 13 or later. It works on any Mac — laptop or desktop, Intel or Apple silicon — because it listens through the microphone rather than a sensor only newer MacBooks have.
What if I do not like what it says?
Change it. Every line can be edited, deleted or replaced with your own, and you can put the originals back in two clicks. You can also save different sets of lines and switch between them.
Will it go off while I am typing?
Only if you want it to. One slider sets how hard you have to hit it — from a light tap to a proper whack.
Does the window have to stay open?
No. Close it and oofie keeps listening with no icon in the Dock. Open it again from your Applications folder when you want it back.
When do I get it, and what if the 100 is not reached?
If 100 people pre-order by 1 September 2026, oofie is released and the download is emailed to you. If not, every payment is refunded in full, automatically — you do not have to ask.
Is it safe? Could it have a virus?
oofie has no internet connection at all. It cannot download anything, send anything, or talk to a server, because there is no server. It reads no files and needs no permissions except the microphone. Before release it is signed and notarised by Apple, which is the check macOS runs to confirm an app has not been tampered with.
Will my Mac actually become self-aware and take revenge?
No. It is a sound player with a face. When it hears a knock it plays a line you can read, edit or delete yourself — there is nothing behind it deciding anything. It cannot open, change or delete a single file on your Mac, and it has no way to contact anyone. The threats are jokes you are allowed to rewrite.
Can I get a refund?
Any time before release, for any reason, just by emailing. After release, if it does not work on your Mac you get your money back.